21 More Catches

Guess what book I’m Reading. I’m probably haven’t interpreted the word “catch” correctly. There is no particular order (I will reorder if you explain why) it’s just the order I thought of them. I don’t expect to have to be creative, especially in the beginning but expect to have to come up with a few ideas by the end of the list.
Catch – 22/near impossible version

  • Catch 1: You can’t afford it – and I can get more for it
  • Catch 2: You’re too young – when you’re older than me I will consider it
  • Catch 3: It belongs to everybody – you need their permission to use it
  • Catch 4: It’s Illegal – the crime organizations frown on it
  • Catch 5: you can’t expose it to organic material – including you
  • Catch 6: You can only if you can add something to improve its efficiency – it’s effective because it’s small and simple
  • Catch 7: You have to leave it in better shape than you found it – It’s perishable
  • Catch 8: Your hands have to be clean and exposed when you open the door – the doorknob is filthy1
  • Catch 9: You have to increase value – all you have to work with is priceless historical artifacts
  • Catch 10: You’re too old – time is linear
  • Catch 11: You don’t speak the language – having the right pitch is vital to being able to speak the language. This can only be developed through being exposed to native speakers at a (very) young age.
  • Catch 12: You need more information – to enter this library (not the most relevant so to access this information database)
  • Catch 13: You have to guaranty a result – You’re working in the real world
  • Catch 14: It only goes to the worst off – Other people are aware of this fact
  • Catch 15: It takes a year to complete the process – The process is updated every half year (any amount of time is viable here as long as it is uncomfortably long)
  • Catch 16: You need undeniable proof – anyone can deny it with little consequence
  • Catch 17: Only in case of disaster – If you can ask it wasn’t disastrous for you
  • Catch 18: Only when everything is going smoothly – If you’re asking it’s not going smoothly
  • Catch 19: Only if no one perceives it – Including you
  • Catch 20: You have to completely original – As if this isn’t impossible if you take it literally. You’re using language other people used before you.
  • Catch 21: It has to have no visible effect – this applies also to its influences.

1Of course, you could get around this if you made a time machine out of your materials. I call this the time machine clause, things possible with a time machine are included in the everyday definition of impossible. As time machines are believed to be impossible generalize this outwards but the time Machine clause is a good name for it.
Probably only relevant to logicians and fiction writers.

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