10 Reasons We Don’t

Well I seem to have reached the limit of my knowledge, at least of the stuff I think to write about, and If I were to make an ordinary post today I end up repeating myself. At this point though I’m not sure if I truly believe the posts are untenable, or if I’m abandoning them out of something akin to embarrassment. Still I’ve abondned too and wasted time lazily when I thought they were done deals. So I don’t have much time left, and honestly, I don’t really want to make something tonight. Still I said I would and not posting would be betraying myself so here something is.

  1. Because we should – and we resist, we fight ourselves and others we host debates in the safety of our own heads and when we decide not to we made a brave decision to hide our cowardice
  2. We make reasons we make lists – we talk about ourselves in the third person; it isn’t just me, it’s a human issue, it’s bigger than me.
  3. We create patterns of avoidance – we find things we enjoy and find them early, we are addicted we start the day with a distraction, and then hunger for it. There is no time when we can’t find entertainment and so we consume it. First out of stress and then out of habit.
  4. Habit becomes an excuse – I do this every day, I can’t stop, I can’t not waste my time I need the entertainment to relax to develop. But need is the wrong word, if it’s the only thing we can find safety in it is insecure.
  5. We pluralize – the responsibility is more than just mine it’s ours it’s too big for one person, we can;t do this alone, and so we won’t. A token effort just to show we are participating.
  6. We fail – and we get laughed at – we fail and we get complimented as well and that is when we succeed. But when our failure is mocked, when our experimentation is ridiculed, we take it to heart. You see, we shouldn’t have put in the time and effort, it was a waste, not wanted, we don’t have to.
  7. We devalue ourselves – we give ourselves an escape.
  8. And we try it all – one thing and the other, today I will do it, tomorrow I will get it done. And yet we push it off, there is so much more to do, to be. This is where we start, but we can start at any time.
  9. We stress – we cry we brake down under the pressure than we run away. The stress, meant to push us forward scares us back, we see a tiger in the bushes and we freeze. Because running is hard, and fighting is scary, so we hope that something external intervenes.
  10. We can push – we are aware, if we tried we would succeed we are special, I am special I can, and i will be able to, why don’t I? why? because I won’t because I refuse advancement for fear of becoming unrecognizable, and I lie, I fear advancement for petty reasons, and I make up great ones. And claim them as my own.

One comment

  1. It seems like you spend a lot of energy fighting your story about how you are. Language is important. It’s not I can or can’t. It’s that up until now I have or have not. All that’s necessary is to acknowledge and adjust.
    You can change your word and commitments, and how you choose to allocate your time.
    Keep it simple, Let the drama pass a little.

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